Dear God take me now....

Yes. It's 1:28am and I'm just posting. (Wait...is it 12:28am? Have we crossed a time zone yet? Why are there not signs on the side of the road indicating such things?) We've just arrived at a LaQuinta outside of St. Louis and all I'm going to say is THANK THE LORD CHECK OUT ISN'T UNTIL NOON. We left Pittsburgh around 12:45pm amidst many hugs and tears. That made my final tally of hours spent in Pittsburgh less than 19. Wow.


We set off and nearly side swipe AJ pulling out of the driveway (totally his fault.) Now - no trip is complete without the obligatory Starbucks stop. Order my usual - caramel macchiato w/ extra caramel and vanilla. Here's what the guy hands me:

Dude. It's 9billion degrees out. It's totally NOT my fault you can't read my mind and make it iced. DUUUHHHH. So - i sweet talk my way out of that near DISASTER and get what it is I truly crave....

Mmmmm. Caramel. So now all is right with the world and we hit the road. By 1:50pm we're in state #3 - WOOT!!! Let's go OHIO lets go! I'm feeling good - in a groove - totally moving along and suddenly I hear this wooshing sound like someone opened a window. And I hear flapping. FLAPPING? And suddenly I SEE flapping....the gasket around the window. Totally not where it should be...

So I fire up my TomTom and hit HELP ME. It brings up car repair places w/in 2 miles of where we are and there is 'Kirkwood Auto Glass.' PERFECT. I call the number that TomTom so thoughtfully provides and a man answers with 'hello'. Normally not a big issue, except that I'm supposed to be calling a business. So I ask - 'is this Kirkwood Auto Glass?' He says, 'uhhh, yeah.' I proceed to tell him my sob story about moving from Pittsburgh to Phoenix and suddenly our WINDSHIELD IS FALLING IN ON US!!!!! He says that we've actually reached him at his home because the office is closed - and that we should be okay until we reach our destination. He hears the hesitation in my voice and asks 'would you like to stop by and let me check it out just to make sure you're safe to travel?' I tell him 'Oh yes! Please!' So - we travel 2 miles past the corn fields, take a left at the big round rock and travel on 3 stones past the creek that Jim Bob is fishing in... NO JOKE. We pull into the guys driveway and he meets us outside w/ his kids and dog and he is totally the nicest guy ever. He explains that he has a lot of things he's doing and would totally fix it if he could, but will get us set till we get to Phoenix. Suddenly - with a wave of his magic wand we are transformed into the most Ghetto Road Trip Vehicle Ever. For real.

Painters tape holding the windshield on. Totally not going to fall in on us - right? So - if you're ever in Hebron, Ohio and have a windshield disaster - this is your guy:

Well - we continue on and no major disaters after that. I mean, except for the dustbowl town we stopped to get gas in. 9 teeth total in the building. 4 people. I have now experienced the place where midwest stereotypes were born. Pocohontas, Oh. Totally pro.

Off to bed. Goal tomorrow is Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. And yes - I have to exert physical restraint to prevent myself from breaking into song everytime someone says Oklahoma.

OOOOOKKKKKKKKKKLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAHHHHOOOOOMMMMMAAAAA....where the wind comes sweepin down the plain!!!

Anyway - it's late. Or early. Whatever.

Night!